Not for Heavy Petting

Yep, folks, I am officially blogging from work. I feel both slackerish (it's totally a word) and a little like I did the first time I pocketed a lipgloss from Fonk's Petstore as a kid.

Wait, is there a statute of limitations on shoplifting lipgloss? If there is not, then I am only guessing how that would feel. Ahem. Moving on.

So, the reason I am writing this at work is because I could not let this go untold to as many people as humanly possible. It is so good that I also could not wait until I got home from work to tell you all about it.

Conversation just overheard between my coworker and one of our customers:

Coworker: That $5 Washington State Parks donation, donate or opt out?

Customer: Well, I'm going to tell you, I got caught at the park. I was asked to pull my trousers up because there was no heavy petting allowed. I said, 'isn't that what the parks are for?' and the officer said, 'no, they are for recreating*.'

This is then followed by stunned silence throughout our office. I would like to say that this was a random customer who we never have to see again, but he is actually a regular. He is also not a young man by any means. I tried to make a joke out of it by saying, "I'll make sure to let the Parks know that if they only allowed heavy petting they'd get a lot more donations." But he didn't think it was funny because he was completely serious.

He walked out and all three of us began laughing. I was already logging onto Blogger and as my coworker says, "can you believe he just told us that?" I was saying, "oh, I am totally blogging this right now because there is no way I'm not sharing it with the world!"

I know, "the world" is awfully narcissistic of me and completely inaccurate, but it's the sentiment I am trying to display here.

So, here's my question, did you donate to the State Parks on your last tab renewal? If not, would heavy petting being allowed in the parks have changed your mind?

*So, according to dictionary.com, recreating can be used in this manner. I didn't know that, but it can, which makes this footnote pretty silly. So, just ignore it.


Hug those babies, teach them to love our State Parks, but don't let them near the crazy old guy with his trousers down.